Letter #4

Freddy,

I'm right glad to 'ave you 'ome, mate. Honest. I know you wasn't away for too long a'time, but I missed me gnomey bruvah.
Being that we ain't employed at adjoining posts any longer, we ought to set up a weekly game o' cards or 'orseshoes. Mind, they'd haveta be from right tiny 'orses, but...
Anyway, mate, come on over for a pint this afternoon if ya can, you know, before the missus gets 'ome. She hates it when we drink on account of us getting a might rowdy. We can't 'elp it; the ale, she is a fickle lover!

Gnomes before hoes,
Ivan